Claire's Diary 26/11/2015

26/11/2015

Dear diary

Rock pools are like nature's lucky dips. You reach in and see what your prize will be. Usually it's a fistful of sand with some shards of limpet shell in there. Once I found a crab. He tried to pinch me, but I distracted him and dropped him into my bucket. I wonder if Roger would like it in a rock pool? Maybe he would make some new friends? Or anemones! Get it?

Claire

Claire's Diary 25/11/2015

25/11/2015

Dear diary

I feel overworked. Which is odd seeing as I am currently unemployed. everywhere needs cleaning. It never ends. Just when I think I can finally sit down and watch Rick and Morty, I realise there is still a thick layer of dust on literally every dumb surface! Maybe I ought to get a job as a cleaner? If I didn't hate cleaning so much I probably would.

Claire

Claire's Diary 24/11/2015

24/11/2015

Dear diary

Today I am in my blue bow. That means I feel blue. I feel blue because I no longer have anything to do. No job to go to, no friends to meet with, no live theatre to see. Nothing. It's about as lonely as it can get. What's that? Roger? Well, he's in this box with me because he's also feeling blue. He tried flirting with the little plastic diver I put in his bowl but it didn't respond to him. Plastic figures can't feel love.

Claire

Claire's Dairy 23/11/2015

23/11/2015

Dear diary

I have witnessed some mystic sorcery! I saw somebody moving along the street without moving on legs! And even more amazing, they weren't using a skateboard! At least I don't think it was a skateboard. It was more like a segue without the handles. But isn't it astonishing that one can steer a vehicle without the use of handles? This looks to be a revolutionary technological breakthrough.

I still prefer skateboards.

Claire

/

Claire's Diary 22/11/2015

22/11/2015

Dear diary

I got caught in the act! Roger will not be pleased! Really not my finest hour. Roger spotted me pinching a cookie from the jar in the kitchen! Granted they were not his cookies in fact technically they were mine. I love cookies. Almost too much. I'm still a little concerned about how fat I might get this winter. Last winter I looked like a chinchilla. I'm hoping this year I'll look more like a goat. I might just have one more cookie. Then that's it!

Claire

Claire's Diary 21/11/2015

21/11/2015

Dear diary

Today I thought I'd have a go at being adorable. It did not go well. I think the little dress I picked out might not have been age appropriate. Still fits though. That's one of the advantages of being a slow-grower. Though I'm not such a slow-grower when Christmas time comes around. This time next month, I'll be lucky if I can fit inside a chub suit. Still, at least I'm skinnier than my brother. He's fat. And smelly. And I think he has athlete's foot.

Claire

Audio Junk #151 - This job is too hard!

Claire's Diary 20/11/2015

20/11/2015

Dear diary

The beetles are back! Remember that last one I mentioned? Well, I've just spotted one on my purple table. I fear I might have an infestation. Although, they never seem to be the exact same species so they can't be breeding. And they don't seem to be hanging around for very long. And I've only seen 2 of them. So I suppose this information points to this not being an infestation. Panic over.

Claire